from Prof. Howard Seeman at:www.ClassroomManagementOnline.com
First: only do these suggestions below only if you feel congruent with them. Generally, we have less constructive impact on our students if we are not authentically ourselves as we teach.
As I say at: www.ClassroomManagementOnline.com : “Don’t try to be the TEACHER. Instead, try to be YOURSELF while you teach.” More tips about classroom management at my site. However, for now, regarding these Parent/Teacher Conferences:
A. In order to get as many parents as possible to attend these conferences, you or your school might try to:
1- ask the parents when they are available and schedule the conferences accordingly;
2- schedule any siblings into back-to-back appointments;
3- have translators available;
4- schedule the appointment and send two reminders;
5- call and re-schedule a no-show as soon as possible.
B. Have a system for how parents see you, e.g., a sign up sheet outside your door: with your name, class, your child is:…, parent’s name, phone no. ?, please print, etc. And a table and some chairs for waiting parents.
C. Since many parents may not speak English well, if you can, try to have someone with you who can translate for you and them, e.g., Spanish. [Do not use another student; such will violate privacy.] Usually non-native language parents can listen much better than they can speak, and also can read better than they can speak. So, speak slowly; they can listen/understand better when you do that. And, try to write out things for them. Then, be very patient about their ability to tell you their side of the story.
D. Have on the walls or black board some helpful information.
E. You may want to have your students write their parents a short letter in the class - just before parents-day. Then, you can start off your conference with: the parent reading this letter. You can ask them to write about, e.g., things they’ve liked, favorite subject, something that is hard, tell their parents they love them and appreciate their coming, etc. Such is often a great start to the conference with the parent.
F. You probably need to open with: “Hi, your son/daughter is:…?”
G. “Thank you for taking the time to come here.” “How can we I best use this time for you?”
H. It is always best to listen to these parents first, before you talk. Parents may be coming in with upsets/angers; if they are allowed to vent first and you show understanding, the meeting goes much better.
I. Do not interrupt, even if you disagree, for now. Say: “I understand how
you feel….” You can make input after they feel more understood.
J. If they do not start first, come prepared with some questions, e.g., “Are you concerned about any particular area for your daughter/son?”
K. You may want to review with them what you have already or recently been teaching in your classes, and what is coming up next, maybe on a hand-out sheet that you can give them, or on the black board.
L. Be prepared and organized to easily access any grades, work, or evaluations about each student; some that you can actually show the parents. You may want to go over these the night before, especially regarding students who are in “trouble”.
M. Always start out with what the student is doing well; the more the parents here these, the more they will be able to take in what s/he needs to work on. Then:
1. Focus your comments on things that can be changed.
2. Limit the number of suggestions so that parents are not overwhelmed.
3. Avoid jargon. *
N. Explain your grading system or reward/punishment system. [Hopefully, this went out in a hand-out early in the marking period. Have it available to review with the parents, if necessary.]
O. If you are meeting because of a student’s academic progress or lack of progress, you can recommend that the student be placed on a behavior sheet/homework tracker, either via your computer. [See: http://classroom-management-tips.suite101.com/article.cfm/class_homework_assignments ]
or a sheet you design. This helps the student [and parent] organize him or herself while holding them accountable for his or her behavior. The sheet goes home to the parents often and they have to sign it and send it back to school with their son or daughter. Explain that this form of communication will make an ongoing communication between the student/teachers and his/her parents.
P. Try to form a working-together contract with the parent. “We can work as a team here. This is what I will be doing. Can you support and reinforce some of these at home?” “Perhaps, we can write this out and show him/her, and have him/her even sign it?”
Q. Keep in mind that every parent is worried: “Am I being a good parent?” Try to reassure them here, that parenting is very difficult. [Share with them, if you have been or are a parent]. Reassure them that: I am sure you are doing the best that you can.
R. Your main guideline should be to listen a lot. Your talking often helps less than they feeling that you listen, do not interrupt or judge them and that they walk away feeling understood, and got a chance to vent.
S. Also, watch the time: too much time with one parent, makes all the other waiting parents angry, who may not have been.
T. At the end, again: “Thank them again for coming.”
U. More tips:
http://content.scholastic.com/browse/article.jsp?id=4194
http://www.teachingheart.net/parentteacherconference.html
http://www.atozteacherstuff.com/Tips/Parent_Teacher_Conferences/
http://content.scholastic.com/browse/article.jsp?id=4195
Unfortunately, the parents that usually show up to these conferences are usually the parents of the students doing well; too often the parents of the students who need the most help – sadly do not show up. This is a tell-tale symptom: a child who has a parent with little time or resources to parent well – is usually a child struggling. And, it is very hard for a teacher to make up for all these deficiencies. [But, some of you do save some students.Then, you deserve great awards! - instead of the insufficient appreciation you often get.]
More at: www.ClassroomManagementOnline.com
The next sharing seminar starts on Nov. 30. Join us?
